Wednesday, August 10, 2011

the art of losing.

There are things I love and have taken for granted, yet these are the things that I find (especially now) to be what keep me motivated and strong:
  • Letters in the form of emails--the kind that share truth, wisdom, stories, honesty and advice.
  • Short, medium and long Skype/Facetime/phone calls, because there's something pure and wonderful about face-to-face or voice-to-ear communication. It lets someone know you care.
  • The question, "How are you doing?" and the time to truly care about the other person's response.
  • Text messages from friends on important days, wishing luck and giving encouragement and support.

Relocation brings about an interesting revelation as we discover that the people we make a point to keep in touch with through the above means are the ones who we keep in our lives as we move through each new chapter. At least, I've found this to be true. From high school through college and now out in the "real world," I've found myself working hard to sustain the friendships I've made. Unfortunately, we can't all stay in touch, and I've also found myself losing people who were once important to me. I hate to think that I prioritize my friendships, butI think that we all do that. It's impossible to be close to every single person who's touched our life in some way.

Four years ago, I started to lose touch with someone whom I spoke with almost every single day. Now, we don't talk at all. I haven't spoken to her in about two years. Even now, I'm slowly drifting apart from people I've been close with for the past one to six years. I recognize this, and I'm trying to find a way to deal with it. Because nobody likes drifting apart, but it happens. Some will say this is just how things go, but I want to fight for the friendships who've brought me this far. At least I want to try. It has to be a two-way street, though, and honestly? It's gotten more and more exhausting to tug at the arms of those who aren't meeting you halfway. I think I'm ready to pull over and turn off the engine.

1 comment:

  1. I was just pondering this kind of thing today as I draw on 8 weeks since the day my first love told me he was done with me. I miss feeling like he would care about my daily adventures, and feeling like I could make his day better by saying hello and doing the kinds of things you're talking about- reaching out, interacting, being connected. Amazing how we can be willing to offer something so valuable as friendship or love and have it left at the doorstep.